Friday, May 15, 2009

Call Me Vladamir Poutine

Today's plan was simple: Hit the road by 6:00AM so that we could get to Montreal around lunchtime. Usually when we set a goal like this I know in my heart that it is comical to think that it will actually work out this way. Jen, I think, still believes these goals to be something that could actually happen. I feel that setting an unrealistic goal and then do our best to attain it will make us leave earlier than if we didn't set a goal at all. Jen, every time, somehow thinks that these goals will be met and was a little disappointed as we didn't get our of bed until 7:00 and on the road until 8:30.

This late start meant that we'd get in considerably later than lunch. However, our last trip to the motherland was such a disaster that we ended up giving up and getting a hotel room in Buffalo at 2:00AM. Therefore, this trip was still promising to be a tremendous success by comparison.

Our trip was largely uneventful, save for a rest stop that had a myriad offers for sexual favors complete with locations, exit numbers, and even a website where you could meet up with people who would "keep you company" so to speak.

We stopped in Westport, NY, where we went to Everybody's Market to see about getting some lunch. Apparently "everybody" is in the market for Double Stuf Oreos, Old VHS tapes of Stephen King made for TV movies, and an antique chest of drawers. While food didn't seem to be too plentiful they did have some freshly baked brownies which had a sign suggesting that you might want to share them with a friend. I purchased a brownie with no intentions of sharing them with anyone.

After the market we traveled a little further into town and went to Me & My Girls where we ordered two Reuben sandwiches. When we opened them in the car it turned out that each Reuben was actually two sandwiches which meant that after lunch we had a net gain of two sandwiches. All for just $14. Four Reubens for 70% of what it costs for one Reuben at Katz's Deli.

After horrendous traffic in Montreal we got to Jen's Nana's place around 5:00PM where I immediately passed out and Jen, thankfully, started taking pictures. Now you don't have to use the power of your own imagination to picture our adventures.

We went out to dinner at Jen's Grandpa's favorite restaurant, Brasserie Le Manoir. Note that Grandpa has two Molson X's. He ordered them both at the same time. That is style. Fifty-or-so years his junior I ordered my Molson X's individually because I am nowhere near as cool as he is. Also, his shirt advertised something about snowboarding. Jen's Grandpa could only dine with us until 8:00 because he had an appointment. Presumably he was going to be skydiving while drinking a pair of martinis.

Jen ordered the tourtière to see how it compared to her own recipe.

I had the poutine because I'd been in Montreal for two hours and I didn't want to waste any more time not having poutine.

After dinner we went back home, had some tea, and Jen helped her Nana refine her Facebook account. We also went through her unread email. All of her email subject lines appear to be spam except that every one of them is from one of her friends. Two of the subject lines were "This MUST Be a Beer Drinking Dog" and "This Bird Loves Ray Charles." I think this friend of hers may have the best eye for email forwards I have ever seen. They were videos of a dog peeing creatively and a bird dancing to Ray Charles, respectively.

In the Commonwealth of Canada emails forward YOU! What a country!


Sandy said...

It sounds like you are having a blast. Wish we were there!

uberlours said...

Vlad, couple of thoughts.

Waiters in Brasseries do not recognize orders for 1 draught. I beleive the waiter thought in fact that Jen's Grandpa was ordering 3 draughts for himself.

Jen beleives that plans happen for this reason. Jen;s Mum would ask me when we should leave on a trip. I would say X hour. Jen's Mum would say "what are you crazy?" I would say no, leaving at X hour would allow us to miss, insert your version of rush hour traffic here, or we could leave later and add Y hours to the adventure. Jen's Mum would think quickly of the added Y hours of 3 young girls in car/mini van and agree that X time was indeed a fine time to depart.
So Jen grew up beleiveing that plans to leave at time A and arrive at time B just happened and were part of the natural order of the universe.

Unknown said...

That explains a lot actually. Let's see where tomorrow's plans to leave end up falling.