Monday, October 27, 2008

Days of Crap and Roses

Today started poorly. I got home from work at 5:45AM and only got a few short hours of sleep. While I slept Jen spent her entire morning and some of the early afternoon at the Social Security office being treated to the level of customer service one can only get from a set of self-hating government employees.

Our plans of getting a somewhat early start on our day's trip to New Jersey was thwarted and we left around 1:00PM.

I'd just like to start today by saying that I hate New Jersey. I hate the shape of the state (it looks like a stupid, idiotic peanut), I hate the people in the state (they act like stupid, idiotic peanuts), and I hate the traffic and the smell, and the tacky strip malls and everything else about anything that occurs within the borders of the garden state.

The purpose of our trip was to do the following:

  • Get a large pumpkin for carving.
  • Get a small pumpkin for eating.
  • Get $20 worth of apples that would only cost us $10 at the grocery store (or $0 through our farm share).
  • Get some apple cider donuts.
  • Go to Crate & Barrel to use our wedding gift certificates.

    I don't want to spoil the ending but let's just say that it was not completely accomplished.

    After about an hour and a half in horrible traffic on I-80 we eventually made it through some sketchy parts of nightmarish New Jersey and found our way to the farm.

    90% of the apple orchard had trees which didn't have apples any lower than about ten feet high. After a few expertly executed leaps I was able to snatch a few to toss into our bag. The unfortunate part was that after landing I would inevitably step onto a slippery apple and almost land flat on my back in the dew-covered apple graveyard.

    But it was pretty cool because we saw a giant deer leaping about up the trail. He was leaping ahead and when we finally reached the spot where he was we found trees that were loaded with apples. It was a lot like he was our spirit animal.

    I found this sign off on the side of the road. That wasn't actually a Macoun apple, it was a Cortland but what an awesome sign.

    We looked everywhere and could not find any smallish pumpkins. We were planning on making a stuffed pumpkin for dinner but, alas, that would have to wait.

    Our attempt to find the Crate & Barrel on our way home was unsuccessful. We wandered around route 17 for a while but eventually decided to cut our losses and return home. This day had mostly been like getting repeatedly kicked in the crotch so we were anxiously awaiting calling it a night.

    I used some odds and ends to put together a salad with mache, almonds, horseradish, avocado, lime juice and olive oil.

    Our prize pumpkin joined us at the table as we enjoyed an organic Syrah with dinner. After today I think I was a little more in the mood for whiskey. Or Everclear. Or battery acid.

    We didn't actually have anything real to eat all day. We had some granola bars on the ride to the farm. At the farm we bought some delicious pumpkin cookies. And then we also had some cashews. However, no real meals were consumed until we returned home and had this spinach fettuccine with garlic and grated Parmesan.

    For dessert we had our apple cider donut with a scoop of vanilla ice cream and some sliced of one of the Cortland apples.

    After dessert we mostly lied around watching the Rangers/Islanders game and reflecting on how crummy the day had been. It's currently 8:48PM and I don't know if I'm going to last through the third period.

    Even if I wasn't low on sleep I think all of this prologed exposure to New Jersey must have some sort of medical affect.

    Even if that medical effect were a positive one (such as curing cancer) I think I would opt to stay out of that state.

    Well, tomorrow is one of our last farm shares of the season. Let's hope for something other than apples!

    Jen said...

    I think the odds are extremely good that we will be getting apples. But that's great, because that means applesauce!

    Lisa Marie said...

    I took Mum to an apple orchard features a corn maze whose design last year was Gerald Ford's face. While in the apple barn part of it, Mum cut in front of at least 30 people to reach the front of the donut line.

    Unknown said...

    A maze in the shape of Gerald Ford's face is the best idea I've ever heard of. Whoever came up with that deserves a raise.